Tuesday, August 4, 2015

you don't know when to shut your damn mouth

Did the title of this post startle you? Apparently this is what you say to someone when your argument about racial slurs falls flat. I never make post like this and I probably won't leave this one up but just for now I have a few words for someone I'll not embarrass by naming. I usually go easy on people and try to win them with kindness and I am a full on all about turning the other cheek. When something stays with me like this did I know I'm probably suppose to bring it to light so I'm speaking out this time. I just know that there are other people who feel just like I feel about these things, right Paige?

Tell me who you know in this crazy world today that refers to white people as Honky? That was the excuse I got when I said it wasn't okay to use racial slurs, "Well, they call us Honkies." Who calls you that? Who is "they"? Are you saying every black person calls you that. I don't know a single white person who even knows what Honky means or why it is offensive. You just know it because you heard it on Sanford and Son & The Jefferson's.

When you say that you were  victimized by black people in your youth, who were they? I remember the incident where you, along with cousins, yelled the "N" word at some very small children as they walked back home from buying candy at the store. How you became the victim in that scenario I don't know. A very smart person said in response to your claim to your mother about being the victim in this story, "you remember Tonya when black people sold us in the town square, beat us to make us work and called us Honkies?" If you want to make this your claim to victimization then what about the white people who have made fun of you or picked on you? Did that make you hate all white people? Your logic is bullshit. Yelling "you don't know when to shut your damn mouth" at someone in the middle of a restaurant at your mother's birthday breakfast because you fear having a conversation you cannot win, is also bullshit. You are an adult. Act like one.

I don't have to shut my damn mouth. If you can't have a conversation without yelling at someone then maybe you should shut your damn mouth. I've held my tongue with you ever since you said to me, "I hate your guts you damn bitch." I don't have to hold my tongue. You may win at shutting me up in a public place but this is my space and I'll say what I want.  Your honky ass should be elbow to elbow fighting along with these people you hate. The system isn't made to support you either. You are not a corporate billionaire. Educate yourself man. Maybe start with this.

Now that I have spoken to you in the only way you understand I'll say things my way. I know your goal in life is to not be weak. It does not make you weak to care for other people and to let go of grudges. I know people didn't tell you they love you growing up but that doesn't make it okay for you to hold so much hate in your heart. You can let things go. That is what a strong person does. It's easier to be a victim and to hate in the face of pain. Loving and overcoming takes much more strength. Being able to say I'm sorry and I forgive you is what strong people do. Your life is the mirror of your thoughts. If you want to see something better in your mirror you have to start with your thoughts. The world will not mirror beauty back to you if all you can see is ugly.
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